Pt. 2 - A Noble Experiment
May 29th, 2007 by Jane Devin
My hands were covered in the ink of other people’s papers and mail. My nails were ragged, my clothes faded, and the reality of time, both given and lost, was suddenly closing in on me. The jobs I’d always viewed as a means to an end were, I began to realize, really the end. This job, as casual mail carrier, was something like my 33rd.
Along the way — stints as a media buyer, technical writer, advertising supervisor, frozen food salesperson, cocktail waitress, radio salesperson, bookkeeper, freelance editor, counselor, factory worker, massage therapist, property manager — in three different states.
All I ever wanted to be was a writer. Any other career option was for me, for the longest time, insignificant. I went where the best benefits were; wherever there was an opportunity to earn just a little more money and a little more personal time.
But, at 45, the stamp of rejection was like a permanent banner hanging over my head. As a writer, I had been discovered and lost so many times that I no longer cared — about the banner, or the hearty encouragement of mentors and editors. My love of writing had become cursed by practicalities. I had bills to pay and no health insurance. I needed surgery, my dog needed surgery, and the chase for a $50 or $100 check here and there, for stories that took weeks to complete, was hardly practical.
The perception of writing as a “gift” was offset by the realities. Of life and my real (rather than wishful) place in it. Of financial concerns, credentials, competition, my love of solitude, and my introverted nature. To be successful as a writer, one has to submit their work. They have to be self-promoting, and able to tolerate even the most unmerited rejections — to have their best pieces sent back in favor of the shoddiest prose written by the editor’s friend or former student.
Once, I dedicated a year to nothing but submissions. The result was $700. Two of the published pieces were marred by the typesetters. Cousteau’s Daughter was rejected in favor of a meaningless and trite little poem by a writer who was acquainted with the editor. My rejection letter was quite lovely, even handwritten, but hardly sincere.
That year, I discovered that the love of writing did not extend to the love of marketing my own work. The effort to publish was the unexpected antidote to my writing obsession. The focus required to write was thoroughly distracted by the research of publications, sales pitches, and the copying, stamping, and mailing of manuscripts. I detested all of it, and missed the solitary act of writing — the intense draw to the blank page and the passionate drive to fill it with a meaningful story.
So I gave up on marketing “Jane Devin”. I continued to write, because that’s what I’ve always done, but I was no longer writing for a make-believe audience of readers. My writings turned introspective. I wrote journals, a childhood memoir, and a book of poetry. I felt alive and fully like myself again.
Then I moved, this time to a farm, and found myself living with people who demanded almost all of my spare time. The writing went on the back burner, and I felt like I had lost not only my voice, but my spirit. The silence I heard within myself was crushing. I ignored it and attempted to truck in all the practicalities that others insisted I lacked. I “buckled down” and went to work at six a.m. in the morning. I mucked horse stalls and mowed acres. I cooked and cleaned, paid the bills, did the laundry and, exhausted by it all, watched TV in the evenings.
I felt like an imposter. I also felt like maybe it was necessary. Perhaps I’d gotten everything wrong from the very start, and these lessons in living the most practical and ordered kind of life would set me on a better path than the one I’d carved out of my own stubborn will.
And then Anna Nicole Smith died. A tainted angel done in by endless heartache and strife, an addictive nature, and the inability to go on after the loss of her beloved son. And Howard K. Stern, her longtime attorney and companion, was locked not only into grief but into the torturous stocks of media and public disdain.
I watched the television shows with sadness and astonishment and then, as the battering stepped up, with anger. I came to the internet, a place I’d only previously used for email, research and news, to gauge the public perceptions of Smith, Stern, and the media’s coverage. I found many perceptions were being informed by a mean-spirited and speculative media. The exception was a website created by “QV”, a tribute site for Anna Nicole Smith and Howard K. Stern. Still relatively new, the site had attracted a dedicated legion of people, including Smith’s fans, as well as people who were simply repulsed by the media’s treatment of Stern.
Inspired by their like-minded passion, I began to write again. I left the farm, cutting my work hours down significantly, and moved into a one bedroom apartment. I started a website to express my views and hopefully to provide even a tiny counterweight to the lynch mob mentality of media giants like Nancy Grace, Geraldo Rivera, and Greta VanSusteren.
It worked in some ways, and failed in others. Perhaps it was a noble-minded experiment by an inexperienced “blogger”. An internet chapter in the life of a faded writer still hoping that one story, one article, would make a difference for somebody else. It may be, too, that I’m not really a writer, but a worker who writes. Whatever this experiment was, and whatever it is now, it has changed me.
Tomorrow my hands will once again be covered in the ink of someone else’s papers and mail, but they will wash clean, and I will rush through my day to get back to this story — my final thoughts on Anna, Howard, Daniel, Larry, Dannielynn, Virgie, and all those who inspired this site - and me.
Dear Jane, It did work! You opened my eyes ..Not black and white, I already know that… but the grey. The road less traveled. Don’t ever stop writing. You are a truly gifted individual.. You have managed, with a little help from your friends, to speak your truth and ours. May God bless you always real good. Warmest Regards, Jimi
Thank you, Jimi. I hope your daughter is doing better! - Jane
I really wish you luck.
My Dear Jane Devin,
You are most definitely a Writer!
The insults and innuendo, rejection after rejection, more and more manuscripts, change this, change that – then go back, we have a deadline, scrap that, make room for this, edit it down…ok done. Never mind, just forget it, we sold the whole page, advertising pays, not the editorial on those pages.
You seem familiar with this type, or similar heartbreak.
A lot of writers ‘want to write,’ so much compassion, so much competition, so little pay, so little time…but you have the ‘gift,’ and it’s more than just passion, you have to have the will and the drive in you to fight, that, and a story to tell; then on top of all that emotionally draining, gut wrenching work, it also has to sell.
After that, you invest a lot of your hard-earned profit, personal energy and time, for what is needed, those darn supplies; a new laptop with all the bells and whistles, peripherals, and a never-ending, constant stream of glitches…obsolescence built right in, time to upgrade!
No, I’m not a ‘Writer,’ but I do like to write.
~I sing you praises for I love your work.
One of my favorite posts from you, Freida. Thank you - Jane
Jane……..I find it hard to believe that anything you put to paper could be rejected. I have always found your writing brings to life the the people we would have other wise glanced at then discarded. there will never be an end to this story, it is about real lives and I hope that even when we no longer see their names in print, we will never forget them. To me you have given a less insulated world. You have made me realize I had almost forgotten that I am my brothers keeper. Today people are so busy with their on lives they forget to watch out for their neighbor.You have given me back my neighborhood. For this I can not thank you enough, I hope we will have a very long relationship. I’m sure there will always be a dragon to slay. As a mother I can only guess at the prayers you say when you see your daughters beautiful face. God bless you both.
Lynda, having you on the site is a blessing. I think you’re right, though, there may never be a real end to this story Thank you! - Jane
Jane,
I never stopped coming to your site and reading your work; but, I stopped commenting. I just got so wrapped up in this saga that I knew it was best that I did back off. However, I would never consider you as a “faded” writer. Jane, your words just flow…………..and it is obvious the words come from the heart and soul of your being. I will always come to your site and read your work because you have captured me as a fan. I thought about all of the rejections you had mentioned and it made me wonder about other writers of your caliber that has been rejected in favor of a friend, etc. I am thankful now for the HKS bashing because a lot of us would have never had the privilege of reading your work and knowing what a gifted writer Jane Devin truly is. As we say here in the South, you are a “good†person Jane Devin!! In addition, I was so very happy that your daughter arrived home safely. May God bless you and yours…………
Cheryl
Great job again Jane, can’t wait to see the next story… Love ya girl
Jane
You are a terrific writer and have enriched the souls of more than you know in many countries. You have provided the facts, done extensive research and taught us much. We now look at things from many different perspectives and try not to judge. You have opened our minds and our hearts. You truly have a gift from God and I thank you for sharing it with us. I know we have become better people because of it.
Although I know that some things have not turned out as you would have wished, I am sorry that you had to endure that hurt and I don’t blame you for being angry and disappointed. I am angry and disappointed as well.
Sometimes things have to get worse before they get better. After you have reflected and made your peace, dust yourself off and continue to do what you do best, write.
It is my sincere wish that you will allow us to continue along your journey, in whatever direction it may take.
All the best
Margie
Jane-
Coming back from a wonderful family vacation I am saddened by the fact that QV is gone as well as all of the people I chatted with. I am so glad that you will remain writing here. I love every piece of work that you have posted. Thank you so much for your writings, they are awesome. I can’t imagine why someone would not publish your writings.
Thank you all so much for everything! I wish you all the best with your daughter!
Vanessa
Dearest Jane,
Read your post first thing in the morning, and ah, I so wish to meet you over a cuppa coffee and a jelly donut or hot apple pie a la mod (with whipped cream), listen to you and shake your hand!
First off, your efforts did not fail. No. You gave a haven and a sense of “I, too, count, I too have a place where I can speak out against injustice.”
God knows there is plenty of injustice in this world …
Each and every one of your articles here present a solid piece of writing and sharp insight.
Regarding rejections. Ooooooooh, yes, those darn rejections.
I am a writer as well (and at one point was an editor and publisher) and know all too well that rejections got nothing to do with quality of writing. It’s a lucky strike. Yes, persistence helps. But not enough. Never enough.
So we write because we HAVE TO WRITE.
GOT NO CHOICE BUT TO WRITE.
Are you a Gemini, or have a Gemini Moon?
What you did re. HKS and ANS was to give them back some of their dignity.
Look, as I’ve said before, I too am a writer, and have websites and a blog site, but all these months, for a combination of reasons, including health and injuries, also depression and lack of energy, could not bring myself to write about it. The only place I added my five cents to was your site. And because you inspired me.
By the way, your mailbox and blog moderation must take a whole lotta chunk of your time. I added this saga to my blog only yesterday
http://www.karinavita.bravejournal.com/
and had plenty of junk posts which I had to delete one by one. An amazing number of junk, especially considering that the only place I announced this, is here. No, none of the junk comes from here, I recognize the style of most of my fellow posters. It seems that these were random surfers, somehow ending up at my place, and got excited thinking they could sling mud and bathe in dirt.
I am figuring it will die down soon.
Well, if not, I can always delete delete delete.
Anyhow.
You are a great lady, great mom, terrific writer, hard worker, and I salute you with respect and attention.
Jane, I work in a library, and your books should be there. You have a gift, and a dream keep at it and don’t give up. One day I want to see your book in my library.
Linda
PA
Jane, please don’t ever doubt you are a writer. You write beautifully and you touch more people than you may think. Maybe, I don’t know, your work has not reached the grand stage of literature but, imo, that is not how you measure success. To me, literary success is reached by the affect your writings have on those who read them and your writings have affected many of us. It may not be the grand stage but does that really matter. Success is measured in your heart.
Thank you, Jane!
Jane
I have to admit I didnt know that you wrote books. If I heard/read it in the months I have reading and posting on your site and QV’s it slipped my mind. I apoligize. I looked here to see if you have a link to a listing of your books and I didnt see one.
Can you email me a list?
I look forward to your future writtngs.
I also want to say I miss the friends that I have met on QV’s site and chat. I dont know what happened(except for a bit that Jane emailed and explained). I feel bad I didnt get to say goodbye to them. Most of them have my email Please, stay in touch and let me know how things are going. Let me know as soon as there is a new site/chat to meet again.
Hope you all enjoyed your weekend and Hope you all have a wonderful Summer.
Mish
Mish, I too already miss QV’s site and chat. I went to the site this morning and found a message from QV. I went to the chat and it was gone. I also look forward to “meeting” again.
Cara
Jane, if only you had been the one to write the movie on Anna Nicole’s life. I can tell you it would have been realistic, yet heartfelt, and overwhelmingly touching—just like you!
To our Dearest Jane:
Thank you for your prayers. I think I’m working on all four cylinders today. LOL Thank God for blood thinners.
Each morning when I get up and turn on my grandson’s computer yours and QVs websites are the first I go to. I wait with anticipation for the next exhilarating article, written by your so gifted hand, knowing that you put your heart and soul in every word. Your writing inspires, captives and educates our hearts and minds. Your have helped so many people come out of the closet of despair with your articles on abuse. You gave people hope and encouragement that they did not have to end up like poor Anna. For that alone I think you deserve a Pulitzer Prize.
Many people in life want to live a fairy tale existence with lots of happily ever afters, that doesn’t exist in the real world. Life has it ups and down. As we go down the path of life there are many bumps in the road. One you have just experienced. Please do not let a few ungrateful, disrespecting people guide your path in any other direction. We need you here where you belong.
As #7 My Mothers daughter said quote “You are a terrific writer and have enriched the souls of more than you know in many countries. You have provided the facts, done extensive research and taught us much. We now look at things from many different perspectives and try not to judge. You have opened our minds and our hearts. You truly have a gift from God and I thank you for sharing it with us. I know we have become better people because of it.â€
We love you Jane and we will be here for you, as you have been here for us. God bless you in all your endeavors.
To Kristina,
Thank you so much for your kind words, I’m doing better.
Dear Carol Anne,
I have not even begun to read your post.
I’ve been worried about you, dear.
Now, I will patiently, and calmly, go back and read what you say.
Hoping with all my heart that you are OK.
oh jane, thank goodness you are here. first i will say that the link above , when i opened it looked familiar. like a lot of links i have been opening lately,from other questionable sites. you have been are being attacked by those who are frightened of you and your words. you are not just a little poster site happly searching away looking for anything to help howard k stern. you have a following out side of this , little screen , i read your message all over the intrnet. and those who are afraid do not want it to get anyfurther than this little screen. i need to do something about the lies and eundos that i keep hearing , about the truth from others. but i had recieved many emails from others wanting to get me on their team, bashing every thing but their truth. and i wrote back asking questions, because i t was the first time i ever di d this post thing , and i had good info i was getting , and all the responses were very negitative. towards this and qvs site. i had to mke a decision and i emailed qv and she did’nt know what i was talking about. because of the other posts that were in question. thats when i knew i had to send all of these to qv, so she could tel lme something. and one thingi know in my heart after i sent them off to her i felt a lightness, in side of me that i did make the right choice, dellete me if ya want
Well Jane,
who said it was easy to write?
If it was only writing!
Since couple times I realise Anna is not dead for nothing!
That’s bad we were not able to take care of her before, and it’s ironique!
She was deserving a better life and better cover from the media.If the media were there to help her instead of laugh and put a label at her all the times, understand what she was living in, that shoud help her and her beloving close family!
The human are stange!
Since she and Daniel past,everybody took position!
It’s to late I agree,but her dead came big and a lot of poeples make a lot of money on it!
A lot of poeples come from the dark and came on a spot!
On as sociology case it was a big example how the society can take position we can see who is this society. We learn a lot since months.
We can see whow nasty can be the media!
That was a big lesson for me and I am shure for most of americain poeples.
BUT in all this mess there were some places were we can go and take reconfort and it’s not many places.
Jane you are one of the place!
Like I says before you are one of human woman in a web and you ad this courage to start writing with your convictions.
As you can see you were right!
I saw more and more poeples comming in your site days after days and it’s not for noyting!
You have a style a profond humanity and it’s respond of a big demand.
Anna may be, gave you a chance to be discovery by us.Tank’s to her.
Many of us have to say tank’s to Anna .She will stay with us for ever,changing our life and consciousness.
So Jane we will continue to fallow you in your report and writing!
who said it’s was easy to write?
Jane, I am almost speechless, I want to tell you something about your words. I don’t read a lot. Your words, I actually had to print out and take with me the A.M. because I had to read them. You make a person who does not like to read want to read. It says a lot a whole lot.
Jane,you are a gifted writer.Your writings have a soul, a voice of their own.Your humanity makes it so. I enjoy reading anything you write. I also enjoy reading what the other bloggers post. They are good people . Please,don’t stop writing
.
Jane, I really look forward to reading your final thoughts, it is my prayer it will help me work though some of the same questions I have asked in which your previous article ask. Thanks again, Mary
sorry Jane, I keep coming back to you, I just can not understand myself and why I have endorsed behavior that if it were coming from my own son I would be upset. I would say it was wrong. Do you understand?
it was compassion wasn’t it? I felt sorry for a man in such pain and excused a lot of behavior I normally won’t have.
Your comment, #23, just makes me even more convinced how trashy our news media has become in this day and age, as we’ve become. This whole story should have been mentioned on the evening news DAY 1, and that should have been it, period.
Laura, what? I am trashy for compassion? We are trashy for discussion on an open format? Your opinion but you are still here posting, interested, it is human nature, it was a shocking story. Speak for yourself I don’t feel trashy for my beliefs or questioning my actions. It makes me feel stronger and have learned a lot about myself and others.
was I misunderstood
Dear Frieda:
Thanks for your concern, I had a TIA which is a small stroke or brain dysfunction. I’m doing better. I’m having some problems with confussion at times.
I miss your postings on QV’s site I always read your post. You are sweet.
Correct me if I am wrong Laura P.. Mary, I think she is saying that there is too much press on this story and the wrong type of press at that.
I also got too deep into this story and have made a lot of personal sacrifices as I know Jane has and a lot of you who post and read here as well.
Its amazing though. After just one day of being released from what I felt was my responsibility, I feel so much more free. I was actually reading over at TMZ and laughing. Usually I leave there angry at those hateful people but today, I was able to laugh at them and myself as well.
Thanks Jane!
what is going on at tmz? I never go to the site. I have heard they are explaining what happen at your site though? Kristina has a site and if I were her I would be careful what I believe
Right, QV. This whole “story” got way too much publicity. Who knows how it would have turned out without the “media” tracking things day-to-day and blowing everything up to kingdom come…
Our military just found 3 of our US soldiers beheaded, and they apparently were tortured “barbarically” to death prior to the beheadings. That is not even meriting front page CNN, NBC, CBS news tonight! Now, THAT is an outrage, if you ask me. And, it’s a crying shame we ever had any media coverage at all on Anna Nicole Smith, at least beyond the initial reporting, and maybe one update of where she was being buried. The families of the soldiers are understandably very angry at our government.
And, also, just 5 hours ago, 4 British security guards and 1 British civilian were kidnapped by the Shia organization in eastern Iraq, and I’m VERY worried what will become of these people! I am NOT worried about media coverage of Rosie O’Donnell or Lindsey Lohan’s reported drinking binge.
I will admit that I do not share your ideas or opinions about HKS, but I am in awe of your writing without a doubt! Even though I disagree with some of your opinions, I have ’sent’ many people I know to your website to read your work. When I read Cousteau’s Daughter I cried and cried. I CANNOT believe that it was ‘bumped’ for anything, most less some trivial piece written by a friend of the editor!! That is sacrilege! But, that makes it even more appealing in my mind! I’ve loved writing all my life, but I’ve never really been into poetry, because it’s just so….much??….so deep??…I think what I mean is that it is so PERSONAL!! Even though, I’ve never been ‘into’ poetry, I was ‘moved’ by Cousteau’s Daughter! So much so, that I told everyone I knew about your site. I just honestly ‘felt’ that poem, and for that, I thank you.
Is there a way to join your mailing list? OR more specifically, a contact page other than your message page? If so, please let me know, since I would like to forward some information to you. Thanks, Kim
Laura, maybe it was a way to escape the reality in our world, for my family the war has caused us so much stress and the lost for our soldiers, it has not set well in our hearts. This story was an escape from it. I do not think any one is trash for following it or becoming involved, there is so much to learn about human nature and the characters themselves. It teaches us what happens to your life when you do not obey God’s laws.
thru the characters
I feel that I got caught up in this story, because it was a way for me to escape my own problems.
Linda
PA
a way to escape, but I learned something about myself as well. The characters only validated what I already knew
And Laura you are right about the Marshall estate although I still can not figure out why he was not represented better, I would take issue with my attorney if in fact you can not disinherit a wife, and like I said I would be upset if I were one of his children he should have looked out for them.
Frieda, I heard hefner said he graduated from college but I do not know what he studied, it sounded like he was in journalism but I am still not clear on that
Kim, look at “About the author” and you will find her email address.
Mary, you said, “It teaches us what happens to your life when you do not obey God’s laws.”
No truer words were spoken! I agree so much. There are many lessons to be learned in this whole entire saga. Greed is at the root of so much of the behaviors of so many people. While we don’t know the hearts and minds of the individual characters, we can glean *some* character indications from their behavior. So many young, pretty girls go off to Hollywood each year to become a “Star”. Sadly, very few make the ‘cut’. Many end up in drugs, sell their bodies to each and every producer or director to ‘try’ to make it. Some end up in prostitution! The ones who have a leg up on the others are the existing movie star’s children. Most of them are high school dropouts, like Johnny Depp. Yet, they are making $$$millions each movie and will never have to work again. So few at these YOUNG ages are able to maintain their values and beliefs, if they ever had them to begin with. Anna’s “attitude”, I think, is indicative of all Hollywood. They are probably the biggest bunch of back-biting, back-stabbing, and scurrilous group there is out there, and Anna Nicole was right in the midst of them all. I wouldn’t want that kind of life, would you?
Mary, you are a ‘thinker’, not set in your thoughts…I wish we could verbally talk, because this mode of communication, while good, does not suffice at times!
Take care…
Laura P!
You said … Our military just found 3 of our US soldiers beheaded, and they apparently were tortured “barbarically†to death prior to the beheadings….
Oh my God, saw it nowhere but here… are two of them the missing soldiers?
Yes, all night long they were showing Lindsay Lohan, yes, yesterday her open mouth was front page photo at New York Post.
Gosh now have to go surf today’s newspapers.
Thanks for alerting us!
No Laura, this is what is most bothering to me, I was defending a position I would scream at if my children behaved in. I have come to the conclusion it was my compassion but it does not excuse my attitude towards HKS. I was absolutely blinded, I was idealistic, and I feel betrayed. He and Anna told us so many lies and I bought them, well most of them but I shouldn’t have bought any of them. The group are manipulative and self serving. I can not explain to you my feelings but there was something I saw and heard in his voice and I wonder how much control he had over Anna even though it seemed Anna was in control. The other thing that keeps nagging at me was the way he insinuated the Marshall estate into the testimony at the body hearing, it seemed he was still keeping his eye on the ball (Marshall estate) but it seemed inappropriate at that time.
I try to look at this from all angles, coming to conclusions.
To: Maryst and Laura P.
Great post, thanks you guys.
I have been told that you have been kicked off TMZ is that true. I don;t see why they would do a thing like that.
Kristina, yes, they were those 3 missing boys. If you want, I can post the link. It’s a shame that our government wants to hide things like this, no doubt, for their own political reasons. Of course, I disagree with hiding this information, and my heart feels so sad for those boys and their families. Let me know if you want the link.
Dear Laura P,
Please, yes, do post the link! I checked out the front pages of NY Post and Times, am also keeping an eye at excite.com and msn.com, but failed to find anything.
Thank you!
Jane, this is such a well written and strong story generating in the reader such great emotion, and images. you are a great writer. glad you left the farm.
I just went to QV’s site and see that it has closed down. anyone know what happened. I havent been there in a week or two.
WHERE HAVE ALL OUR VALUES GONE ,LONG TIME PASSIN WHERE HAVE ALL OUR VALUES GONE, sounds like it might make a nice song, or someyhing
Vivian, now you made murmuring that song!
Oh yes, When Will They Ever Learn ….
Where we so different, in those days?
Here is the link to the song, words and music by Pete Seeger:
http://www.arlo.net/resources/lyrics/flowers-gone.shtml
Ooops, Sorry for the typos!
Let me correct my post in honor of Remembrance:
Vivian, now you made ME murmur that song!
Oh yes, When Will They Ever Learn ….
Were we so different, AS A PEOPLE, in those days?
Here is the link to the song, words and music by Pete Seeger:
http://www.arlo.net/resources/lyrics/flowers-gone.shtml
some posted that the missing us soldiers were found tortured. I have been searching the news and have not found that. anyone find a link?
I see other people from QV’s chat etc are here! Hi there miss ya all too
Kristina, here they are:
http://www.boston.com/news/world/middleeast/articles/2006/06/21/us_pair_reported_tortured_beheaded/
http://www.savage-productions.com/beheaded_soldiers_iraq.html
If you do a google search, you’ll find a Korean website that has it, but I just couldn’t get it to come up, so I had to go to a different one at the 2nd link. The 2nd link is so, so sad. They captured and found all 3 of the soldiers.
Do you think it would be a good idea to share them with your family and friends? I did.
Take care!
thank you thank you for the words. i have always loved this song, and it is so appropriate right now.
found the story about U.S. soldiers. they were not the ones kidnapped awhile back.
http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/meast/06/20/soldiers.missing/index.html
Kristina, the first link is not correct. Although it’s true, I made a mistake and posted you an “old”, outdated link from something that happened last summer. Sorry.
You’re very welcome, Viv.
I am still looking for news about our poor soldiers. Perhaps they are holding it back to notify the families first, also, if they’ve been beheaded, they’d need to be identified without a shadow of doubt before they can release their identities.
True, every day, more and more of our boys are dying over there….
Cry me a river.
Dear Laura P,
I did not see any link …. did you post it here? I missed it?
Anyhow, as I’ve said before, prob’ly they’re waiting to make a positive ID.
Dear Laura P,
Just saw your post with the two links. Yes, the first link is old, but the second one seems right … awfully so!
And it mentions Anzack’s aunt, verifiying his death.
If true, then yes, most probably it’s not yet official, the government is waiting for some other info before releasing this info.
Poor young men. May they all rest in peace, they, and each and every one of them dying day by day …
I hope there is a better existence on the Other Side.
Jane, I wanted to check in with you to let you know I am looking forward to your next part
It’s in the works, maryst. By tomorrow night, at the latest. Thanks!
I came in also to see if Jane had her newest article up. I need to know. . .what has happened to make QV close her site and if it was really warranted. Please don’t let a few jerks spoil things for everyone else. I don’t mean to sound insensitive to the bashing they did ( I’m not), but please don’t let them win, by closing us down. I’m sure they would get a kick out of that. Any rotten apples just need to be picked out and thrown against a brick wall, splat, lol.
It’s a shame that a few people have ruined it for the rest of us and they will all continue to carry on as they have been.
Does anyone know if QV is still going to open up a site again?
I really miss it. I have no way of finding out anything anymore. I don’t get court tv and don’t hear anything on the news. Maybe there isn’t anything to hear yet. I would visit QV’s site several times a day and late at night. I miss everyone.
Does anyone know if the inquest has started yet? Jane I can’t wait to read your next article. I’m very patiently? waiting lol.
Joni, the series will continue but the next article won’t include the internet conflict, which came near the end. That’s several days away yet. If you’d like to email me with questions, it’s jtdevin @ gmail.com. I understand QV has temporarily put her site back up while she gets her new one ready.
QV is back up and running…
Splat! That was funny Joni!. I felt lost without my site too. It’s become such a habit.
I can’t wait until Jane finishes her next installment. She cracks me up how she writes, “An internet chapter in the life of a faded writer still hoping that one story, one article, would make a difference for somebody else”.
Quit selling yourself short Jane, you know your writing brings forth a lot of emotion in those who read your work. Most of it good!
QV
Laura p…..Marist………I started posting on this site because there was a man being convicted in the media with no possible way to defend himself. I found this concept totally repugnant to me. I believe a person should be given the benefit off the doubt. I did find that some other people were attacked with very little provocation, only a few words from someone else and they were being convicted, by the same people that were defending someone else. We do not know any one in this saga,and we are all entitled to our own opinions. Every one deserves a fair hearing, and if we don,t agree with the out come, that does not mean they don’t still deserve respect as human beings. J Howard Marshall knew he would pass long before Anna, he promised that she and Daniel would be well cared for after his death. If it were not for Pierce Marshall, I believe that is what would have happened. The Marshall family have no more right to that inheritance than Anna’s estate.Mr. Marshall earned that money and if he promised some to Anna then she should receive some. Johnny Depp is one of my all time favorite actors. My daughter always teased me about his age, I couldn”t lust after him until he was at least 35. My father left school in grade 8, he was a very intelligent man. He and my mother raised 9 children, not one of us ever went with out. We were taught to respect other people, but never let them take away our self respect. We were also taught a good work ethic, a good days pay for a good days work. we were also taught to give congratulations to those who ( some people believe have been given something for nothing) have received a gift in life, not to be envious of others. Not to paint a whole group with the same brush, (ie: all people working in the entertainment industry are back-biting,back-stabbing and scurrilous group) We were taught this by parents that did not go to university
Lynda, he probably should have provided a trust for Anna if that is what he promised her, like you said we do not know…on the other hand if I were one of his children I would have felt betrayed by him. I still think the old man was inappropriate. She probably should be compensated, I am not sure to what degree. I would not expect my step mom to take half of what my parents put together during their marriage. Wasn’t all the money made was from interest and companies the old man put together in his younger year.
Jane Said, “I think Danigirl may have said it best. . .
“Some of us fold under the weight, some of us acquiesce to the notion that there is something wrong with us, some of us grow bitter with time, some of us fantasize a whole new reality and then some of us go through all of these stages.â€
This best describes my constant struggle.
The only official court trial, the Jury in Texas, ruled against Anna. In fact, they ruled so far against her that they didn’t feel she deserved any money at all. I thought that was amazing. If there is a way to view the videotape of the trial, I think we could all put this discussion thread to rest. I just don’t know how to get them.
However, I am quite sympathetic to this woman called Anna Nicole whom I’ve never met. Her history was hell and back again stuff, with all the trauma in between. It seemed she had little self-confidence. But, so many people desire the quick buck, as evidenced by all the Lotto gambling going on. And, Anna is no different and fell into the Hollywood trap. For her, she recognized how her obvious beauty would be an asset to her. Unfortunately, she sacrificed her health in the process, when she had multiple breast augmentation surgeries that went awry. As a result, she suffered and had to take pain medications ad nauseum. It was a heavy price she paid for all the fame and money. Ask Lee Meriweather, a former Miss America, who had breast cancer.
My thinking is that she felt she had no real choice in life. She had no solid relationship with her own mother, as we all know now. She knew she wasn’t real bright intellectually, and perhaps, in some strange way, her ego was improved by marrying a very successful businessman, although old and decrepit. But, she paid a heavy price for that choice, too, by being labeled a “gold-digger”.
A written Will carries more weight in Court. However, my sense is that the family would have settled with Anna prior to court involvement. But, it didn’t go that way, and the Jury ruled unanimously against Anna’s claims that Marshall had promised 1/2 his estate. Hopefully, the family will be willing to “settle” just one more time. I just don’t know, though…
Laura P.,
If Mr. Marshall had met Anna in a cofee shop or at the library, or if Anna had been homely instead of so, lovely, I think there would have been a different outcome.
Isn’t that discrimination?
What if they really did love each other? They did have common characteristics, they were both very ambitious and loved fine things, and neither of them had sterling reputations.
These are just some thoughts, since it really doesn’t matter what I think, and I’m no lawyer, that’s for sure.
Only Anna and Marshall, and maybe Howard K. Stern, really know the whole truth.
I have debated this with Laura and have concluded marshall should have had better estate planning and can not imagine why this was not settled prior to the marriage. I mean it seems really difficult to believe Anna fought him for so many years. If he did indeed intend for her to get half his estate don’t you think he would have made sure of it? Also I think of Anna’s mother, and it reminds me of what Anna put the Marshall’s through. It was very similar behavior wasn’t it? Starting with the body and I am sure years to come Anna’s mom will be fighting with her own grand daughter, probably until VA dies unless the courts stop her. Marshall did a lot for Anna, it is not the families fault she did not do right with it. Most attorney’s did not touch her case, HKS had no clients and was looking for celebrity clients when he got her. He could have very well used the court system to further her career, it got a lot of attention, made her money so win or lose the case she wins.
Finally, marshall does not come off as a wonderful man Anna stated, she said a lot of things which were lies, last one I remember was Larry is delusional. In my mind he is perverted, not loyal (who disinherits a son), and did not look out for his own family. He should have made sure Anna signed a pre-nup before he ever entered into a marriage.
Frieda, it’s true. The ONLY people who really know what their motives were are Anna and Howard. And, I doubt we’ll ever know the entire truth surrounding this whole unfortunate saga.
But, for me, it never was about “looks”. It was TWO things really. It was the astounding age difference, plus the enormous intellectual difference. It seemed they both used each other for the proverbial old “trade-off’s”–just my opinion. Marshall had ‘problems’, Anna had ‘problems’, no doubt. Anna probably thought she’d make out well financially, which she did, but I’m sure she was disappointed in the end, after she’d spent all the money he gave her, died, and left her with nothing more.
There are many “should haves” in this saga. Yes, Mary is right. Marshall should have had a prenuptial. Based on the Will, he should have never married her. He should have worked out his differences with his younger son. Anna’s “should haves” depend on where you want to start in her life.
Sadly, this whole saga could have been avoided. Unfortunately, there are more shady characters in this story, including the perimeter with LB, VA, Jackie Hatten, the Media……that I guess I just can’t enumerate on. So far, Howard was the MAJOR VICTIM in all this. I don’t know Howard’s heart. It *seems* he cared about Anna and Daniel. That’s all I think, for now…
Could someone please post the url for QV’s site. TIA
http://annanicoleandhowardkstern.com/
QV site
Jane, I LOVE the “Traveler” story! Don’t tell us that you were working on THAT poem though while you kept us all waiting here. LOL.
Really, I am looking forward to your wrap up and can’t wait to see what you have in store for the future. Are you going to bring your stories up front and keep them here instead of putting them on temporary pages?
Keep up the good work!
Laura P. and maryst,
You both are very wise. And, maryst may have just made the most interesting point, like mother, like daugter!
FYI,
This is normaly the type of thing that I would post over at QV’s site, but sense I cant… If you all are intrested, I just discovered some brand new and pretty good pictures of Anna, Howard and Dannielynn.
Go to getty images type in “anna nicole smith” the new pictures that I havent seen before start around page 9 & 10
Ok, Jane you have me thinking, you are so good at that. Your articles are truly thought provoking.
In regards to Daniel, was it parent alienation?
Were they trying to do the same thing to LB, is this why he was so upset plus Daniel died. He had to be concerned for his little girl, he knew the life style. I am not thinking he is innocent in all of this because he was involved with them and still is involved with the team but could this be a reason he got very upset? If so won’t he be better off distancing himself from the team?
Jane, does every one know QV site is open?
Here is the link
http://annanicoleandhowardkstern.com/
Maryst, pt. 4 will be my take on the relationship between Anna and Daniel, and Daniel as an individual.
CJ, the reason that the stories and poems are frequently replaced in the “Pages” section is because if I left them up on the site, I’d have to say they were “previously published” which would make them difficult to publish elsewhere.
Thank you all for your contributions to this series, and your patience while it’s completed. Part 3 is now up.
I went to the gettyimages site. Checked out the pictures. OH boy! did my emotions come into play. There are some never released pictures there. There are pictures of Anna showing off her tattos of her two children and her. Those brought on the flood works for me thinking of poor baby Danilynne.
I also noticed in those pictures I seen a mother who no matter tried to cope. I could see Anna’s soul in some of those pictures and as try as she may she held her pain.
As far as people saying she was drugged up the whole time in these pictures you can tell she wasnt. All you seen was a woman who was in pain and was trying to get on and be happy and was having a hard time trying.
Take a look the site is below. Pages 9 and 10
http://editorial.gettyimages.com/Search/Search.aspx